Week 10 BOC: Self Portrait

     

                 
I am absolutely obsessed with all things girly when I am photographing subjects. I love the transformation between "normal" to glamorous by just using makeup and sexy lingerie. I work with actresses, porn stars, makeup artists, hair stylists, and everything "beauty industry". However, I am not interested in these things in my own daily life. I only get my hair cut when I absolutely need to, and I wear makeup, but only enough to pass as acceptable in public. Shopping for clothes is an absolute nightmare for me, and I wear high heels once a year (if that). 

For me, glamour is for special occasions. It's for when we need a morale boost. When we need a break from everyday life to feel special. Being a woman these days is hard. Even on my most efficient day, it takes me an hour to get ready. I don't think that men really know what it's like. To leave the house without makeup makes most women feel naked and vulnerable. Many wouldn't dare.

So, this love-hate relationship I have with makeup made me wonder: what does makeup really do to my appearance? This week, I went to the MAC Cosmetics store. For those of you that do not know: MAC is a popular cosmetic line known for their dramatic looks. They hire "artists", that look at the face as if it were a canvas. (When I left, I definitely felt like I had a layer of paint on.) 

This was the result. At first glance, I thought, "Oh, it's different but not as different as I thought it would be." Once you look deeper, however, you can start to notice some serious changes to my face. The bare side looks plumper, like I have a baby face. The left side is contoured to make my cheeks more defined, and my lips much fuller. The defined eye line, eyebrows, and larger lashes my my eyes look whiter, wider, and greener (I have hazel eyes, but the purples used bring out green tones). I cannot choose my favored look, so I think that confirms that my daily choice of makeup is best for me. Nothing crazy, just enough to enhance what I already have.       

Week 9 BOC: Conflict Photography

I have an incredible amount of respect for photo journalists covering crisis and war all over the world. I served for six years in the military, but I never saw war up close. I could not imagine witnessing someone killed in front of my camera lens. Watching The Bang Bang Club really opened my eyes to the struggles those photographers face. The feeling of helplessness must be overwhelming. I can understand why they cannot intervene, but seeing those things really must take it’s toll. 

This week’s photo assignment reminded me of an experience I had a few weeks ago. I was asked to photograph a hockey tournament between the fifteen teams from all over North America, including fifteen teams from Canada. The tournament was called the CHE (Candian Hockey Enterprise) Cup. I knew some of the players on one of the teams very well, and had I known what the tournament would really be like, I may not have accepted the request to photograph it. It is common knowledge that hockey is taken very seriously in Canada. Many hockey teams have “goons”; players who’s sole purpose is to antagonize the other team, defend key players, and intimidate the opposing team. Many times, these players will pick fights with anyone they see. 

Witnessing these fights from behind the plexiglass obviously was not the same as watching a suicide bomber, but it was difficult to photograph nonetheless. Actually knowing the teammates that we fighting was even more unnerving. More than once, I found that I was disengaged from what was going on because I was behind the camera. I was so focused on getting “the shot”, that it almost gave me a false sense of reality. Once I looked up from the camera to see my friend getting punched in the head repeatedly by a much stronger player, it sunk in what was actually happening in front of me. 

If I have a difficult time photographing a contact sport, I know I could not be a conflict photographer. I can empathize with the mental anguish that line of profession comes with. 

Week 8 BOC: Nudes

I will never understand why nudity is such a taboo in this country. We are supposed to be this superpower, most civilized, technically advanced country in the world, but yet nudity, homosexuality, pornography, gender reassignment, etc. is such a sensitive subject for so many Americans. Equally frustrating is the fact that violence is so accepted. Children can see death in the news and in video games, but the natural human body is seen as vulgar.

However, we all know that sex sells. It seems to me that making it so off-limits just creates more demand for it. If I have children, I will make sure they know what the human body is supposed to look like, not the distorted version that mainstream media has tried to make us think it is. 

Week 7 BOC: Collage

When we take photos, we can never know what impact those photos will have. What emotions those photos will invoke. The best I could hope for would be to capture a once-in-a-lifetime moment, to be treasured for years to come. Photos that could be passed down from generation to generation. To be picked up decades down the road and looked at with fond memories of happy times. But sometimes, the opposite can happen. 

A few weeks ago, this family did a photo session with me to celebrate the announcement of their second child. She was ten weeks pregnant and nearly ready to share their excitement with friends and family. She ordered prints and started making announcement cards. Unfortunately, they lost the baby. So now these photos, that were supposed to represent happiness, changed to sorrow within such a short amount of time. 

So what does this mean for the photographs? Should we delete them from my hard drive? Burn all the prints? Or should she keep them as a reminder of grief? Instead, they took the small prints and attached them to blue balloons. They invited their friends to join them as they released the balloons and share in their experience.

   
  Even though I would never want my photos to make anyone sad, I'm proud that they mean something. They can mean grief and sorrow, or hope and appreciation for what we have.

Week 6 EOC: How Art Has Changed Me

Photography did more than change my life; it saved my life. Five years ago, I was miserably depressed, in a failing marriage, with nothing (I felt) to live for. Not that I wanted to die, but I led a miserable life with no passion.

I was working as a government contractor, and although my husband and I made around $150,000 per year, it was the most miserable job I ever had. I worked with conservative pilots that believed men should not marry other men, and that women would never be as effective in my career field. In my case, they were right, because I gained no pleasure from watching terrorists die everyday from the video feed of a military drone. I truly felt that I was selling my soul. Sound depressing? It gets worse. Our home was broken into multiple times, there was a huge drug problem in that city, and my husband and friends were just as miserable as me. To make matters worse, I drank to forget about the pit I was forced to live and work in everyday.

So one day (quite literally), I hit my breaking point. I quit my job, sold all my possessions, and ran away. I wanted to go somewhere that had more energy, more creativity, and wasn't in California. Las Vegas was home to some friends that told me if would be good for an artist like me. I shot film photography in high school, and really wanted to get back into it (as a hobby if nothing else). I strongly felt that my misery stemmed from a lack of passion in my life. I didn't create anything. I didn't have an outlet.

Now, I know that photography is what I was supposed to be doing all along. I needed a career that kept me interested, and we all know that photographers are never done learning and growing. I need to make my world better with my art. It has truly made me a better, happier person.

Week 6 BOC: Me Editing Photos

Some photographers dread editing, but I love it. When I have a successful photo session, I can't wait to come home, grab a glass of wine, and really get to work. Lately, however, photo editing has been a logistical challenge for me. We are in the middle of moving, and my precious iMac now lives on the floor, instead of being mounted to the wall. So, I lay on the floor, usually with my dog to my right and my cat to my left. It could be a lot worse, but I am looking forward to being able to unpack in our new home. 

I use several different kinds of photo-editing software, based on what I am doing. If it's just basic editing, I tend to use Apple's Aperture program. This is also where I keep my library of photos. Apple recently decided to stop updating Aperture though, so I will eventually have to move over to Adobe Lightroom. As far as I know, the two are pretty similar. I am slowing starting that transition now, but it will probably be another year before I have completely switched over. Of course, I also use Adobe Photoshop when I need to do "deep surgery" as I call it. But that's usually only about 10% of the time. 

So there you have it. My workflow.

Week 5 BOC: Camera Store

I wish that Las Vegas had more camera stores, because I am usually forced to buy my gear online. This week, we were asked to take a photo of ourselves in a camera store. I chose Target (I know...boring). However, it got me thinking: what are the best camera shops in town? Here's what I found after a little research as well as personal experience: 

B&C Camera:

4511 W Sahara Ave

Las Vegas, NV

(702) 871-1100 

1550 E Tropicana Ave
Las Vegas, NV
(702) 736-0890

https://store.bandccamera.com/

I have ventured to B&C Camera a few times and appreciated them, but wished they were a little closer. From my experience, these guys are great with camera repair. They are very knowledgable and helpful. HOWEVER, they are a bit overpriced. I don't usually buy lenses from them. They do offer classes and workshops though. 

Fry's Electronics:

6845 S Las Vegas Blvd
Las Vegas, NV 89115

Phone number(702) 932-1400

I refuse to go here. They never have what I want, their customer service is terrible, and their experts always look at me like I have two heads when I ask them simple questions. 

Las Vegas Camera Club: 

1017 S 1st St

Ste 185
Las Vegas, NV 89101

http://lasvegascameraclub.com/

Specializes in Poloriod and film products. This is a highly specialized store in the heart of downtown. Unless I want to take a stroll down memory lane and get a working Poloroid camera, I don't think I will be going here anytime soon.