I have an incredible amount of respect for photo journalists covering crisis and war all over the world. I served for six years in the military, but I never saw war up close. I could not imagine witnessing someone killed in front of my camera lens. Watching The Bang Bang Club really opened my eyes to the struggles those photographers face. The feeling of helplessness must be overwhelming. I can understand why they cannot intervene, but seeing those things really must take it’s toll.
This week’s photo assignment reminded me of an experience I had a few weeks ago. I was asked to photograph a hockey tournament between the fifteen teams from all over North America, including fifteen teams from Canada. The tournament was called the CHE (Candian Hockey Enterprise) Cup. I knew some of the players on one of the teams very well, and had I known what the tournament would really be like, I may not have accepted the request to photograph it. It is common knowledge that hockey is taken very seriously in Canada. Many hockey teams have “goons”; players who’s sole purpose is to antagonize the other team, defend key players, and intimidate the opposing team. Many times, these players will pick fights with anyone they see.
Witnessing these fights from behind the plexiglass obviously was not the same as watching a suicide bomber, but it was difficult to photograph nonetheless. Actually knowing the teammates that we fighting was even more unnerving. More than once, I found that I was disengaged from what was going on because I was behind the camera. I was so focused on getting “the shot”, that it almost gave me a false sense of reality. Once I looked up from the camera to see my friend getting punched in the head repeatedly by a much stronger player, it sunk in what was actually happening in front of me.
If I have a difficult time photographing a contact sport, I know I could not be a conflict photographer. I can empathize with the mental anguish that line of profession comes with.
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